By Satyabrat Borah
Valentine’s Day has quietly but firmly found a place in public conversation across Indian society, including Assam. Every year on the fourteenth of February, the day arrives with red roses, heart-shaped balloons, social media posts, advertisements, celebrations, criticism, excitement, and resistance all mixed together. For some, it is a day of joy and emotional expression. For others, it feels unnecessary, artificial, or even threatening to social values. This mixed response itself makes Valentine’s Day an interesting subject to reflect upon. The real question is not whether the day should be accepted or rejected outright, but whether it carries any meaningful significance within our social and cultural context.
Valentine’s Day is associated with love. Love is not a foreign emotion. It is one of the most fundamental human feelings, deeply rooted in every culture, religion, and civilization. Long before Valentine’s Day entered Indian consciousness, love existed here in many forms. Ancient literature, folklore, devotional poetry, and oral traditions are full of stories of love, longing, sacrifice, and emotional bonding. From Radha and Krishna to Heer and Ranjha, from Usha and Aniruddha to local folk tales passed down through generations, love has always been present. What differs is not the emotion itself, but the way it is expressed and socially understood.
Indian society, including Assamese society, has traditionally viewed love as something deeply connected to responsibility, family, and long-term commitment. Love was rarely seen as a loud public performance. It was often quiet, restrained, and woven into everyday life. A shared struggle, mutual respect, emotional endurance, and social responsibility were considered stronger proofs of love than words or symbols. In such a context, the arrival of Valentine’s Day, with its emphasis on public display, individual romance, and commercial celebration, naturally feels unfamiliar to many.
Globalisation has played a major role in bringing Valentine’s Day into Indian society. Through films, television, the internet, and social media, cultural practices travel faster than ever before. Young people today grow up watching global content where Valentine’s Day is portrayed as a normal and joyful celebration of love. For them, participating in it feels natural. It becomes a way of expressing emotions that they may otherwise find difficult to articulate in a conservative social environment. Seen from this perspective, Valentine’s Day becomes less about copying the West and more about finding emotional language in a changing world.
At the same time, the commercialisation of Valentine’s Day cannot be ignored. Markets play a powerful role in shaping how the day is perceived. Love is packaged into products, offers, discounts, and social expectations. The idea that love must be proven through gifts, expensive outings, or social media visibility creates pressure, especially among young people. Those who cannot or do not want to participate may feel excluded or inadequate. In such cases, the emotional essence of love is overshadowed by performance and consumption.
Criticism of Valentine’s Day often comes from the fear that it promotes superficial relationships or moral decline. Some worry that it encourages impulsive behaviour without emotional maturity. Others see it as a challenge to traditional family structures and cultural values. While these concerns are not entirely baseless, they also risk oversimplifying the issue. A single day cannot be blamed for deeper social changes that are already underway. Relationships, values, and social norms are evolving due to education, urbanisation, economic independence, and digital communication. Valentine’s Day is more a reflection of these changes than their cause.
It is also important to recognise that love does not exist only in romantic relationships. One of the limitations of how Valentine’s Day is popularly celebrated is that it often narrows love down to couples. This can unintentionally marginalise other forms of love that are equally important. Love between parents and children, between friends, between teachers and students, and even compassion for society at large are often left out of the picture. If Valentine’s Day is understood only as a celebration for romantic couples, its relevance becomes limited. If it is seen as a reminder to value human connection in all its forms, its meaning expands.
Assamese society has always valued emotional bonds, even if they were not loudly expressed. Care for elders, loyalty to friends, community solidarity during crises, and respect for relationships are all expressions of love. These values do not disappear just because a new cultural practice enters society. The challenge lies in integration. Instead of rejecting Valentine’s Day as alien, society can reinterpret it through its own cultural lens. Love does not have to be loud to be real, and celebration does not have to contradict dignity.
For young people, Valentine’s Day can serve as a starting point for conversations about emotional responsibility. Love without respect, consent, and understanding is incomplete. If families, educators, and society engage with young people instead of silencing them, Valentine’s Day can become an opportunity for guidance rather than conflict. Suppression often leads to secrecy and misunderstanding, whereas dialogue builds awareness and maturity.
There is also a quiet irony in how Valentine’s Day is sometimes opposed. Many who criticise it in the name of culture still enjoy love songs, romantic films, poetry, and stories that celebrate similar emotions. This shows that the discomfort is not with love itself, but with changing forms of expression. Cultures are not static. They evolve, absorb, and adapt. What matters is not preserving tradition in rigid form, but preserving its core values while allowing space for new expressions.
Valentine’s Day also highlights an important social reality. Emotional expression is still difficult for many people. Men are often discouraged from expressing vulnerability. Women’s emotions are frequently judged. In such a context, even a single day that normalises emotional openness can feel liberating. This does not mean the day is perfect or necessary, but it does explain why it resonates with many.
The resistance to Valentine’s Day often reflects a deeper anxiety about losing control over social norms. Change always brings discomfort. When young people choose their partners, express affection publicly, or prioritise emotional compatibility, it challenges older models of authority and structure. Instead of framing this as a moral threat, it may be more useful to see it as a shift that requires mutual understanding across generations.
Valentine’s Day, in itself, is neutral. It does not carry values automatically. Values are shaped by how people engage with it. If it becomes a day of shallow imitation, it will remain shallow. If it becomes a day to reflect on kindness, commitment, and emotional honesty, it can hold genuine meaning. Society has the power to shape this interpretation.
In the Assamese context, where community bonds and cultural sensitivity remain strong, Valentine’s Day does not have to replace anything. It does not need to compete with traditional values. It can simply exist as one more moment in the calendar that reminds people of the importance of human connection. Love does not weaken culture. When rooted in respect and responsibility, it strengthens it.
The significance of Valentine’s Day in our society depends less on its origin and more on our intention. A date borrowed from elsewhere does not automatically erase local identity. What defines us is how we live our values every day. Love expressed with sincerity, whether on Valentine’s Day or any other day, remains meaningful.
Valentine’s Day should neither be blindly celebrated nor aggressively rejected. It should be understood. When society moves beyond fear and imitation, it gains the freedom to choose wisely. Love is not a threat. Indifference is. If Valentine’s Day encourages even a small pause to reflect on relationships, empathy, and emotional responsibility, then it carries significance. Not because it is Western, modern, or fashionable, but because it touches something deeply human that has always existed among us.
